If It Happened Today: A Modern Nativity

I hear there is a census
And all folk should return
Unto the town where they were born
Which is of some concern
As sure enough the traffic
Is getting quite heavy
Particularly in South London
Just near to the M3

For there in middle carriageway
A donkey has been seen
With pregnant woman riding it
Next to a man in green
Who’s said to be a Chippy
Unmarried too they say
And out of work on benefits
Well that’s the claim today!

For so the rumour has it
They’ve travelled from Ascot
And she’s due any minute
To give birth to the tot
Who some are calling special
Saying he’ll be the next king
But if he is then MI6
Will have to do their thing

For Britain has a monarchy
And there is just no place
For an imposter to come in
Take-over or replace
The Queen and the Prime Minister
For that would just not do
Yet certain things are scaring folk
Up in Westminster too!

Reports say there’s an angel
In skies right near Heathrow
Causing quite a commotion
And blocking radar so
And word from Jodrell bank is there’s
A star they’ve never seen
That’s burning in the north so bright
Just where the woman’s been!

So the police are sat in waiting
Amidst these threats and fears
As this young mum is turning heads
As her birth draws so near
And the country is on red alert
To keep a watchful eye
Increasing their surveillance with
The army on standby

For facts are pure and simple
No-one should make these claims
Unless their mad or really bad
Or looking for some fame
And so as Mum on donkey
Heads into London town
The powers that be are on the case
To protect the Royal crown!

Bethlehem 1898. Description given at the source: “No Room at the Inn (…) photograph of a man and woman with Donkey entering Bethlehem. It was created in 1898. The photograph is reminiscent of Mary and Joseph.” (text from same source) Note: As the source shows a number of 1898 pictures “reminiscent” of the biblical story in and around Bethlehem (featuring a couple, a donkey, sometimes a baby etc.) it seems likely that at least some of the pictures were staged. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

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