The Cycle of Life

There’s a somewhat cyclic pattern
That reveals throughout the years
From childhood times to adulthood
And into old age steers

For once I was a small baby
A young and helpless child
An infant needing comfort still
And succour undefiled

With childish way and joyfulness
I skipped and hopped and played
A carefree, fun existence with
Such innocent charade

Then into adolescence went
With hormones steaming fast
Discovering much more of life
Identities to last

The leaving home to venture off
And time for student ways
To make the world a better place
Those pure idyllic days

Before the time of settling down
With partners and broad smiles
And maybe starting a new job
Or career to last the miles

Then hear the cry of baby some
Parenting starts to dawn
The now due pitter patter of
Small feet or sleepy yawn

Before middle age encroaches
Time to consolidate
The changes physiological
Some good; some not so great

The senior years advancing with
Grey locks and wrinkled face
The dawn of life’s reflecting time
Towards old age with grace

Then arrives the final chapter
Old age so rich and wise
I’ll take the time to contemplate
No mask now; no disguise

Time to again accept a hand
That care’s with love and more
To ease towards the last curtain
With childlike eyes and awe

For there is a cyclic pattern
That reveals throughout the years
From childhood times to adulthood
And into old age steers

 

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The Cloud That Masks The Sun

My Dad left us when I was young
I knew not what to do
He said that life was sad for him
To stay right there with you

He said the past had been real bad
Like treading on eggshells
That there was more for him out there
Than staying in this hell

He said there was another Mum
Much better than my own
That she was such a nice person
A new Mum to be known

He said he’d still be there for me
“I’m still your Dad, you know”
But how could he hate Mum so much?
Why did he have to go?

I simply needed just one thing
For Mum and Dad to be
Together now and to recall
That they had BOTH made me

I wanted all the pain to go
For peace – stability
To see the sun come out and shine
For some tranquillity

I needed time to contemplate
To find myself again
I needed space to chill a bit
For I was only ten

I needed time to understand
To try and fathom out
Why adults do these horrid things
That mean they then walk out

I wanted life to carry on
Just like it was before
I wanted unconditional love
To walk right through the door

I didn’t want to hear from Dad
What I should think and do
I wanted him to put me first
And be quite contrite too

But that just didn’t quite pan out
He didn’t hear me say
Why I was sad and what I felt
What hurt me on that day

He just made up his own version
Of events to overcome
His despondency and sense of guilt
The things that made him glum

And so we parted company
It broke my heart in two
For all I needed him to say was
“We’re still both here for you!”

And so the story carries on
A man without his son
And son without his father there
The cloud that masks the sun

 Parental Alienation occurs usually due to divorce or separation where a child expresses unjustified dislike or hatred towards the other parent.  This often results in access to the rejected parent being impeded and restricted unnecessarily and is often said to have occurred due to the negative influences of the non-rejected parent most commonly the parent who the child resides with.  However, on occasions it can be the other way round with the rejected parent causing the situation through their own negativity.  The term does not apply in child abuse cases where the rejection is the result of a child protecting themselves.  The call therefore needs to go to all parents in a split to put aside personal differences, to honour an ethos of love, respect and responsibility for their child to embrace the fact that their children have a dual parentage heritage so that children do not lose contact with either parents in this situation.  For further reading you might like to visit http://resetparenting.com/2012/06/08/paternal-alienation/

 

A Single Moment

If I could create a single moment
Then I’d choose one that would be
Full of happiness and kindness
Expressing how much you mean to me

To show you that I love you
To uphold and lift and care
One to take away your burdens
And answer all your prayers

A moment that would stop the clock
To bring out the sun so bright
To shoot a star up in the sky
Against the moonlit night

To give a glimpse of heaven
To shine down a faithful ray
Yes in a single moment
I’d create the perfect day

Testing Mum!

“I love you! Just not your behaviour!”
Mum smiled wanting to say
“Come on you brat you’re pushing me
You’re getting in my way
You’re plucking all my nerves
And pushing buttons so
You’re driving me quite crazy
It’s either me or you to go”

“You’re becoming quite a terror
I’m stressed beyond compare
I don’t get why you’re acting up
Now watch out and just beware
‘Cos if I really lose my rag
You’ll know it just you see
I’ll tell your DAD. You just wait!
You’ll go without your tea!”

But instead she smiled so sweetly
Bit her tongue – braced herself
As she loved that little rascal
Even when he was an elf
So she stopped before she started
And looked him in the eye
Holding back she took a deep breath
For he had no alibi

And then she quite calmly said it
Those words that meant so much
“I love you! Just not your behaviour
So sort it out and get in touch!
In touch and find that nicer lad
‘Cos recall there’ll be a fine
If you continue down this road
And fail to toe the line!”

Then she continued in the same vein
Without emotion or despair
Pulling him up so very short
He knew she was being fair
For everything she said was right
And he knew he had been wrong
But most of all by all accounts
He’d changed before too long!

Adolescence

If you ask a teenager anything
There’s one thing they will agree
That the older generation
Don’t have sex but just drink tea
For they think they’re really all too old
And only dare partake
In cordial conversation or
At most a small hand shake

And as for these adolescents’ parents
Well heaven must forbid
The thought of their mums and dads at parties
Come on! Their oldies surely never lived!
And when it comes to sporting prowess,
The games and medals won
The muffin tops and double chins
Suggest those times are now long gone!

Whilst the stories from the old days
Get taken with a pinch of salt
Any idea that a parent comprehends
Is “totes weird” as a default!
And forget empathy and understanding
When parents want the best
For a teen perception takes this to mean
We’ll hound you like a pest

So to all parents rearing teenagers
If you want to still relate
Look at their now and future
For your past is out of date
And smile just oh so quietly
Cos there’s one thing to admit
That years ago you said the same
When you were young and fit!

 

Audio visual:  Please click here http://youtu.be/H33mB-CDAi8

Rewards

How children love rewards
Those little treats that say well done
But are they everything they’re cracked up to be
Or are they just drugs that lose their fun?
For what happens when they stop
And they’re not then in the frame?
Do children still put in the effort
If the outcome’s not the same
If the prize just isn’t there
Is there really any point?
Or should they aim for intrinsic satisfaction
Where themselves they then appoint
To become the motivator
Who inspires and who instills
A relentless determination
To makes for happy wills
So that innately, they then foster,
An inherent intrinsic treat
Making the sense of accomplishment
A reward that’s most complete!

It’s Truly More Than DNA

Look out parents don’t delay
It’s truly more than DNA
For children are a blend of two
Their genes for sure and their milieu!

“Their environment?  How come?”  you say.
But it can rewire on the way,
And make a difference; manipulate
Your kids into a different state.

So when you parent and drag them on
Beware for it can go so wrong!
Instead encourage, support and care
With abundant love right in there!

For the environment is absolute
In choosing not to rear a brute
And raising angels all the way
For it’s truly more than DNA!